Getting closer to being real...

So, I had my 3rd beta Friday afternoon and we were up to 1072.  I went in today for beta #4.  So, I will get my results tomorrow.  

And... our first u/s is scheduled for Wednesday.  This is to make sure it is not ectopic, etc.

It is also to see how many sacs there maybe.... gulp.

I know that there is a possibility of twins..... but holycrap.

I'll keep you posted!

Disbelief...

I simply cannot wrap my mind around the fact that I am PG!  It honestly seems so surreal. I had to listen to the message three times!

I just pray that this baby sticks this time...

But for tonight... I am going to enjoy this feeling!

Tomorrow...

At the risk of sounding incredibly dramatic and somewhat cheesey.... the fate of my life hangs in the balance until my beta tomorrow. 

 

    I honestly do not know how I feel.  I remember the weekend before my beta for IVF#1, I had what I imagine a panic attack must be like.  I just got so freaked out that it did not work.  

For my FET debacle, after losing 5 embryos in the thaw... I did not have much faith that it had worked, so I never really had any hope...  I was not counting on good news anyway.

This time, well, I have been surprisingly calm.  No major freakouts ( although the day is still young) and I feel like the best way to describe how I feel is indifferent.  I know there is no reason for it to NOT work, but after all this time, I also have a hard time imagining a call where the dr tells me I have  wonderful beta and I am indeed safely pregnant.  It scares me a bit that I feel that way as maybe on some level, deep down, I already know that perhaps being parents is not in the cards for us.  

Anyway... I guess I need to give it up to God at this point and hope that he feels I have been tested enough and am ready for some goodness.  I hope so as it has been a really long 3 years.  

So, I am going to  Spring clean like crazy today; windows, curtains... you name it, I'll clean it.  

At least it will keep me occupied.

4dp5dt...

Nothing other than that to report...

Distractions

Well, we are one day closer to our beta and I am so thankful that school seems to be NUTS lately.  I have NO time to think about anything IVF/BETA/will I ever get PG related.  

You see... this is the time of year where girls are no longer friends with their best friends and then are and then aren't and then are and then aren't and then are again. 

And.... boys show mutual friendship and camaraderie by wrestling and shutting each others' lockers ... sometimes with fingers, legs and the like, in the way.  

So playing counselor, referee and nurse can be quite distracting.

Sigh... in middle school... Spring is certainly  in the air. 

If they only knew the gigantic favor they are doing for me! :)

snowbabies!

We have 7 of them!

In the words of the embryologist- 6 fantastic and 1 eh!

I'll take it!

Although, this is how many we had make it to freeze last time, and I am not pg, so.....

In other related news, had my progesterone checked today... a whopping 191!  That is good news.

my beta is one week from today.  By this time, I'll know if I am going to be a mom!

Game on...

Well, I am back.  

The ET went smoothly; we transferred 2 back.  Both were in the blastocyst stage- one was AB quality and the other BB.  So all in all, not too bad for my geriatric ovaries.  

Honestly, I am floored.  When my CD 3 FSH came back high, I thought we were doomed.  I am thrilled and so grateful we have made it this far.  

We have 8 more embryos they are watching to see if they will make it to freeze tomorrow.  

And now the wait begins.... my beta is March 23.  Exactly one month before my 35th birthday.  

I hope 35 is a VERY happy birthday.

So.... now I am off to obsess!