Anticipation...

So, after 12 glorious days off, I must go back to school tomorrow.  I woke up with that familiar pit in my stomach this morning , anticipating the end of vacation.  It is not that I don't like my job, I love it actually, it is just sometimes when you have been away from something for awhile, the return is often fraught with mixed emotions.  I do take comfort in the fact that the anticipation is usually more difficult than the event itself. 

    I wish that this was all that was on my mind.  You see, AF showed today.  While this is never fun ( and yes, there was a small part of me that deluded myself into thinking that since I paid no attention to my cycle,  I would miraculously get pregnant), I now need to make a decision as to when I am going to cycle again.  Now that AF is here, I have a better idea of what my time-frame would be like, so I have to weigh my options ( considering some work events) in terms of cycling in Feb v. March.  Here comes that familiar pit.  This break has been good for me, but returning is hard. 

     I also need to talk to my principal, as this will be my first time doing a fresh IVF during the school year.  He is a great guy, but this is a conversation that I never thought I would have with my male boss and quite frankly, I am feeling a little resentful that I even have to have it. 

     So, tonight anticipation is getting the better of me.  But the anticipation is usually more difficult than the actual events, right?